Monthly Archives: May 2008

Just before the buzzer

Phew! Close one here as it is 11:42 PM on Friday and this is my first writing of the day. I was thinking that I haven’t missed a day of writing this month and I’m reasonably sure I didn’t miss any days in April either. I’ll have to look at my calendar to confirm. June will hopefully be the same as well. No days missed. I’m hoping some people out there are enjoying the fact that I’m posting here on the internet and that it’s something entertaining. I don’t get too much feedback on here so it’s hard to judge.
My late writing is due to me going to a small get together this evening at my friend (ex-roommate) Katie’s house involving pan Asian cuisine and plenty of Deschutes Beer. Having ridden my bike, the beer drinking was kept to a dull roar as the road I had to take home is extremely dark and I would prefer not to be taken out by a car. Any who, it was a really nice evening. There were good beers, good food, good company and a killer fire. Smores happened as well.
Really I’m totally tuckered out. With this illness I’ve been fighting the last couple days on top of limited sleep last night I’m struggling to keep my eyes open. This weekend should be very relaxing and low key. Especially after the epic Memorial Day. I think I’m still recovering from that. With gas prices what they are, I’ll be staying in town for a while and sticking to bike transportation (all the cool kids are using it). Ugh. Big yawn. Well, I guess I’ll head off here. Piccadilly is looking particularly cuddle-able right now. I need to take care of that. Have a good weekend folks!

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Wanting to draw

I am not sure if any of you have seen my attempts at drawing things, but they are usually quite terrible. I like drawing straight lines. That’s my one specialty. Boxes, triangles or the startling combination of those two: the diamond. But sometimes I like circles. Only if they are perfect. And I can’t see a design or detail ahead of time. I keep drawing and it usually ends up looking like a mess. More like a drawing of a 7 year old than a 26 year old. But that may be because 7 years old was the last time I really spent time honing my drawing ability (sans that 4 month graphic communication class I took in college and totally got an A in). And it’s always embarrassing to have to draw. It’s hard for me. I get stressed. I get nervous. Social anxiety kicks into high gear. But I’ve kind of lately been thinking otherwise. I need a good challenge in my life. I saw this quote in my horoscope a couple weeks ago by Alison Covarrubias. She said, “If you don’t feel like you’re going to throw up, you’re not taking enough risks.” I read that quote a few times (I even cut it out) and thought that was an amazing piece of advice. When I was in my design class in college, I always felt like I was going to throw up. Constantly nervous. Inevitably that feeling made me quit my major because I didn’t think I needed to go through that much ache to achieve in life. Maybe I was right or maybe I was completely wrong. I ended up living vicariously through great designers and their works.
Any who, I just watched this movie “Sketches of Frank Gehry” and Mr. Gehry talked a bit about how he was always nervous and scared about his designs and ideas. And his sketches are quite ugly and messy. You look at his career and you think he’s got it all figured out. And then you think that it seems like everyone has it all figured out when in reality very very few do. Even those who are the best in their field are doubting themselves. And maybe that doubt is the best thing really. It keeps the human mind working to create and improve. So here I am thinking that maybe I should give drawing another attempt. I should realize that I need to push my boundaries, want to throw up or I’m never going to get anywhere. Well, at least not anywhere I truly want to be. Pardon me as I get my pen and paper ready…….

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Web domains and indy 500

I can think of no finer way of spending Memorial Day weekend than browsing domains at and watching the Indianapolis 500. Can you? It’s nice to be able to lounge after so many hectic days here over the last couple weeks. It’ll be getting crazy here again as I drive up to Forest Grove for the evening for Jill’s birthday party. However I am not looking forward to spending so much money on gasoline. I’m going to try really hard over the next month not to buy any gas. I’m not sure that’ll be possible, but it’s worth the try. $4 a gallon is really ridiculous. My bike is looking like a better form of transportation everyday.
So any who, I’m searching for my own domain name as I think it is time to move on to bigger and better things on my website. I doubt the move will happen anytime soon, but perhaps by the end of the year. I’m finally starting to find names that I like and are also available for purchase.

The Indy 500, I can’t remember ever seeing as many accidents as I have today. I turned the race on at lap 45 and there’s been about 6 or more cars taken out. I wonder if there will even be any cars that finish the race at this point. They’ve got 44 more laps at this point and another crash just happened.

Ok, I should probably go ready myself for the 4 hour drive to beautiful Forest Grove. If anyone sees Piccadilly, tell her she needs to come inside because it’s yucky out and I worry about her. Cheers all.

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Letting go

I so needed to let go of everything. I was having a terrible internal struggle about something. I still don’t know what exactly. My spirit was not happy with my mind set and it all came out Thursday morning without me really realizing it was about to happen. But now, I’m good. So good. I feel like there’s been a seismic shift in me. On why I do what I do, how I do it. And I’m so much better. I started reading the book the Power of Now and it gave me more clarity in my life than few things before have ever given me. I’m not quite finished with it, but I imagine I’ll finish it this weekend. Now, I’m looking forward to a great day with lots of friends. And a lot of pizza (and some ice cream). I kind of wonder if anyone else noticed my change in attitude, change in spirit. It’s weird. My gut and my head both feel differently than they have before.
Well, there’s supposed to be some people coming over to my house very shortly and I want to be ready for their arrival, so I bid you all a fond farewell. If you’re in Bend, and it’s Saturday afternoon, come over to our house for some brew. It’ll be fun. And yes, Piccadilly is the most adorable kitty ever.

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When it rains it pours

Do you ever have those moments where the weather seems to perfectly fit your emotional state? Well, that picture (taken on my phone) above was me driving home from Portland today in the worst rainstorm I’ve ever encountered that I can recall. And during this drive I was having one of those moments where you need to decide if you’re going to completely alter your life or keep it relatively the same. My head was flooded as the rain fell outside my car. In that moment as I carefully made my way through the pounding rain towards Mount Hood that perhaps I should take the rain as a sign. A sign which tells me this alternative road I could take may not actually be the best option for me, however wonderfully tempting and exciting it may be. I needed today. Yes. I needed to know my options, my best options. I found out partially what parts of my life need to be rectified to some extent. I need to be more proactive in improving my current situation. Starting tomorrow I will do it. First thing in the morning.

I saw today what my life could be. It was all laid out in front of me. The next 30 years. There for the taking. The world in my hands. But I’m passing. As a wise man once said, passing on this pretty seashell to search the whole beach and find the BEST seashell.

I apologize for the ambiguity of this post, but I must retain some secrecy. This is the world wide web you know and this post is google searchable. I did however want to let it be known how important today was. Also, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how writers often use weather as a method of setting the tone and mood in a book and I thought today was a perfect weather day to match my mood. This evening as I write this, the weather report is as follows (from the Colleen weather service): mostly cloudy, windy, but some sunshine. Luckily for me, precipitation will remain to the West.

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Snowmen in the sun

A late Sunday night greetings to all out there in Internetland. Another successful weekend is coming to a close here in Bend as I eat my late night dinner of champions (a pasta dish). Our trip to Black Butte was really fun yesterday. The heat was bad as we climbed up. I struggled up the 2 mile trail (my stomach didn’t feel good) but when we got to the top we were greeted with many many feet of snow. It’s rather strange to be hiking in 90 degree heat in shorts through snow. We passed a few people who were on their way down and they said they didn’t make it all the way to the top because of the snow. Luckily Chris and I were not disillusioned and persevered to the top with no problems. It was actually a really nice treat to be able to play in the snow on such a hot day. We even built the wonderful snowman you see in the picture. Afterwards, we stuffed ourselves in various eateries in Sisters and then headed home, exhausted. I managed to stir up enough energy to attend a bbq with some new friends. We had a wonderful evening and I hope to spend more time with them this summer.

Today I spent most of my day putzing around on the internet, making phone calls and watching the Kite Runner. Not a bad flick. This evening I even managed to study a bit for the CLT exam and become more familiar with the test itself. I’m hoping to receive my study guide for it this week so I can really start studying the hard stuff rather than just the plant list. It should be quite the adventure for the next couple months. I’m sure as soon as July hits I’ll begin really stressing. Until then I’ll be superficially studying and getting advice from those who have already taken the test. Any who, I want to finish up my dinner here, make my lunch for tomorrow and get to bed. I’m sure it’ll be an interesting Monday after an interesting Friday. That’s all I have to say about that. Ok kids, have a great week!

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Umm it’s hot.

I don’t know what the weather is like in your neck of the woods, you Colleen’s Blog reader, but it’s really warm here. Like 90. Apparently someone didn’t get the memo that it’s not supposed to be 90 in the beginning of May, nor is it supposed to be snowing the last week of April. The season of Spring is supposed to be about 3 months or so. Not 3 weeks. Oh well….perhaps next week holds better weather for us Bendites. So today in order to get some reprieve from the heat of downtown Bend (and to escape the madness of the PPP, Christopher and myself are headed to Black Butte to do some hiking. I can only hope there are still some patches of snow which I can roll and play in along the way (perhaps pictures to follow). Ok, I just got word that Chris is on his way to pick me up so I should finish getting ready. TTYL my friends. Enjoy the weekend.

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Dead inside

Just busy going through the motions here. Trying to make it till December. Make that December ’09. It’s going to require some real perseverance on my part……….I don’t like this but I’ll just keep trucking I guess. I’m not sure what my options really are unless I start selling all my possessions to get stuff paid off sooner. Any who…….It’s Monday. I made it through one day this week. Woot. And tomorrow should be a real hoot. Tera is leaving for Australia right now. She’s actually in SFO waiting to leave. I shall miss her for 5 weeks. I think the one who is most excited for Tera to be gone is Piccadilly. She has rule over the house (at least for the moment) because Bella is on vacation too. All night Piccadilly has been hopping all over the living room doing various things like climbing up everything she can.

not much else to report. oh, make sure you go out and buy the new Everywhere magazine and flip to pages 50 and 51 as you’ll see my name and work in the print. Pretty exciting. I bought a couple copies on Friday and I plan to hang up one copy in my room as motivation. Ugh. I’m totally tired. I think I’ll head off to sleepy land now. If anything enthralling happens here I’ll be sure to let you all know ASAP. So far: nothing this week. Cheers friends.

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Obama Town Hall meeting

Oh man. I’m still high (a natural one) from the Obama Town Hall Meeting today! It was so cool and surreal to see Barack Obama in person. Before he came in I was just thinking about how odd the idea was that I was seeing him in person in Bend. And then he came out and it was even stranger. We sat up in the bleachers about 50 feet away from him. They were great seats and just wow. He’s so articulate, intelligent and honest. You could sense that he was a great man, but also a man who was incredibly grounded. The questions people asked were really good. One was about nuclear energy, another about student loans, one about appropriate responses to international conflicts and crisis, one for bringing lost jobs back to the US. I think his responses were very good and he gave reasoning behind his answers and how they would have trickle affects on other things. He’s obivously thought a lot about issues for this campaign and is well versed on everything. This week I am going to be volunteering for his campaign and couldn’t be more proud to lend my services to him. This was a great birthday present and has left me wanting to do more with my life. So thanks, Barack. I hope you have a great time on Mother’s Day in Chicago!

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The Big O

We got news today that Senator Obama is headed to Bend on Saturday. So our big plans for the weekend have changed and we’ll be hanging out here instead I hope seeing Barack speak in person which would be amazing. And apparently Barack has gone ahead and made the nomination his own. Good for him. Put Hillary out of her misery. It’s not worth her investment at this point I don’t believe. She should save her money and do something like donate it to the people of Burma. That would be the best idea.

Any who, in work news, my shins have officially gone into work mode. They are full of bruises, scratches and weird bumps. I must admit they are looking very nice. I’ve been able to ride my bike to work everyday this week and the last few have been very cold. It’s’ been hovering around freezing and I’m biking like an idiot in shorts. I bike by all these people all bundled up while I lose feeling in my legs. It’s good fun. By 8:30 I’m fine. I hope you’re all really excited about reading about my legs.

So tomorrow is my birthday! Woot. I don’t know what we’re doing now that our plans have changed so dramatically. At least we’re saving on gas, that’s the only real cost benefit to this plan. Yeah, no official plans. Alright, I’m starting to fall asleep at the computer right now and I should probably make my lunch for tomorrow. I hope you all have a good weekend. I’ll let you know how 26 goes. Cheers friends.

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